Tuesday 14 April 2015

Stretching out of my phobias - Pecha Kucha

Here is my Pecha Kucha presentation at 22nd International Annual Convention of TESOL Macadonia-Thrace. My phobias...

SLIDES

PHOBIAS

Hello my name is Jo and I suffer from digital, filming and other  phobias, I’ll  name just a few.
It all started a year ago , when I had the cheek to take on the presentation of the project which George and I ran with our students .The greatest fears of all were : first



Tibicylindrophobia (aka fear of Youtube)- I find it terrifying to follow instructions and upload on Youtube, it drives me mad , I sweat and shiver .I spent nights in front of the screen , waiting for a video to upload. I stared with terror at the notice that it would take sixteen hours for a five minute video to complete uploading.



Catarractiphobia (aka fear of PirateBay torrents) is worse. One of my greatest secret wishes is to become the Jack Sparrow of the world wide web for once but then again…if I download illegally will I become the dark  Godiva of antisocial behaviour?


Hypotitlophobia (aka fear of subtitling), one of my nightmares, having to add text to a video, it just kills me to think about it. Have you ever followed instructions on Youtube. Then you must be the Einstein of the day, the Steven Hawking of the digital universe.


My Edophobia (aka fear of editing videos)….me having to edit a video, copy paste and cut and clip? Dread  to think of it even!! Things go in the wrong places and then I have to reshuffle. And if you have the illusion that  an imaginary hand will sort all this out ,you have another thing coming.


Opisthomuromusicophobia- phew…I said it, I wonder which torturer came up with these words... back to reality (known to all as fear of adding background music). Yeah, will I ever be able to add background music to my videos? No,way!!! The music pops up at the most unsuitable moments.


Photophobia (aka fear of using a video camera)… my camera is never steady, I tremble and I shake and the result is a blur!!!. My shoulders go numb, I I can’t feel my fingers after the epic shootings and I can really sympathise with all camera persons- yes, politically correct as well !!!


Echophobia ( aka fear of forgetting to switch on microphone), when I , shocked, will discover that nothing was recorded and my sweet voice ,and those of others, cannot be bequeathed to posterity! I shudder at the thought of recording twice.



Misanglophobia,( Not the fear of the wrong Englishman but  that   of taking photos from wrong angles)  ooooh I hate the moment when they tell me “ Jo, you made me look awful taking a photo from the that angle". At that moment  I’m so close to hurling the camera at them and leaving!


My Synchronophobia (aka fear of synchronising video and sound)….: One opens their mouth and you hear them ten seconds later. It’s like one of those Charlie Chaplin movies where the viewers tried, most often unsuccessfully I guess, to fathom what the actor was uttering. 


Chronometrophobia (aka fear of running out  of time), so many things to say and add in thirty seconds with this application. And the clock is ticking! Shall I put my hands over my ears and not hear the boom of my demise? Like now, how many seconds to the next slide?


Lentisophobia ( aka fear of forgetting to take camera lens cap off ). Has it ever happened  to you? You finish your video or photo session very glad with yourself, only to discover that the lens cap was on all the time!!! And then you have to do it all over again…..Or how many times have I thought that that I have captured the moment of a lifetime...



Some people call me Napoleon but my Interroptophobia ( aka fear of getting sidetracked ) is extreme! What if someone barges in while I’m recording and everything goes to waste? 
And, according to Mr Murphy and his law, this is the rule rather than the exception.


Postsumophobia (aka  fear of having to repeat  filming). No no not those lovely Japs with their tight undies; it’s having to repeat  the filming due to all those misfortunes. Will I succeed  the second time or will I go on and on to eternity?



Scriptophobia, (aka fear of people forgetting their lines) just the  thing remembering those myriad  lines, one word  forgotten and chaos ensues in their heads. At that moment  I am ready and willing to tear and chew the script, shoot the scriptwriter and shake the actors’ shoulders hoping they’ll come to their senses.



Mortotempophobia (aka fear of dead lines) Yes, Margarita, I know that my PowerPoint should be ready today!!! These bosses can be so demanding sometimes, no chance of giving you some slack to procrastinate, browse the net, zip your coffee, enjoy the sunshine…anything but work…



And yes I suffer from Applicophobia (aka fear of using the wrong application),too.  Why, which application should I choose? so many…. . Dare to google a question and around a trillion options appear. I just sit there, scrolling up and down the pages….



Opisthohumophobia (aka choosing a background to a scene while filming )-Where should  the scene be set? Do you have the foggiest about how many parameters there are? I asked a fellow professional and  only a mathematician could analyse the sheer scale of the number...


Frigophobia (aka fear of freezing and not knowing when to begin) –nanoseconds do count, trust me. The gentleman in the photo and myself had to begin an interview, the camera person started shooting and we just stared at each other, awkward or what?


PechaKuchaphobia, of course. Oh wait! I think I’ve just overcome this!

Thank you for bearing with me and  my phobias! Please give a big applause for George Raptopoulos , who has been my amateur psychotherapist through this year and who came up with these incredibly long and hard to pronounce words for phobias!

2 comments:

  1. Oh, Jo! You're fantastic! I can't remember the last time I enjoyed reading a blog post so much (no offence to other authors). I love your sincerity and your sense of humour.

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